Wednesday, January 19, 2011

Learning to Let Go

So I've been dealing with a lot of anxiety lately. Going back to school and being here full time has really taken a toll on me. I'm talking to the point where I can't sleep even when I'm exhausted and even have had some spells where I can feel my heart pounding and have trouble breathing. It's not cool. I'm trying to deal with it naturally because I really do not want to be on another pill or have to go to another doctor. Sometimes I feel like thats all I do.

So part of trying to do deal with this is learning to let things go. And by this, I mean a number of things. For one, I get so overwhelmed with what I have to do. I have 3 not-so-easy, and very fast paced classes this quarter. I have homework in all of them almost every night. Plus when I get home I want to spend time with my boys, get the house clean, get dinner cooked, and everything I would normally be doing if I wasn't in school. I'm learning that the dishes and laundry can wait, dinner doesn't have to be a 3 course meal, and sometimes even the homework can be put off for a bit. I need to also start relying on hubby more to help around the house. He will clean and cook, not always when I want him to though..but in his own time he gets the stuff done. I need to remind myself of that. I am learning that I need to just let it go and let it wait till tomorrow. The world is not going to come to an end if the dishes aren't put away tonight!

I also am learning that I need to let go of some bad habits I have. These, I feel, are also contributing to my anxiety. For one, I am horribly addicted to mountain dew. I drink it every morning and usually throughout the day too. It's basically my coffee and keeps me going strong through the day. But it has tons of sugar in it and lots of caffeine and I know its taking a toll on my health. For one my teeth have gotten really bad since I started drinking it, and I feel sure it has something to do with the pounding heart issue I've been having too. So I'm trying to cut back on it for now, to just one glass a day, and eventually quit all together. Another bad habit I have is since I don't sleep well at night, I take a sleeping pill almost every night. I know that is not good for me either so I'm hoping with the cutting back on the dew, I won't need as much help getting to sleep and I can stop that too.

So yea, thats my goals for now to get this anxiety under control. Hopefully they will work and I won't have to see a doctor. I'll keep you updated. Thanks for listening! :)

6 comments:

  1. I can totally relate to this. I have horrible anxiety as well over so much stuff. I'm a really controlling person in that things have to be just so. It's hard for me to let things go once I lock into something. When I was seeing a therapist she taught me some breathing exercises, bc I've been known to have anxiety attacks. Sucks btw! Anyways, I've come to ignore a lot of stuff and remember those things can wait..life can't :)

    A good saying I live by: " Things that matter, things that don't" deal with life in that order. :-)

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  2. Being a mom and/or a wife is stressful enough, I can't imagine adding school to the list. I know it's hard, but try not to worry about everything being perfect. I'm also a control freak and a perfectionist, and it's really easy to get anxious when you're trying to do every "right" all the time. I think it's awesome that you're trying to handle things naturally. As a fellow Mt. Dew fan, I know that cutting it out completely will be rough but you can do it! :)

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  3. well, you have done the hardest thing already, which is admitting not just to yourself, but your readers too. now you must tackle this slowly with a plan easy to execute.

    giving up the soda is great, and any other habits that are not helping you reach your goal. good luck

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  4. Good luck. I hope you can work everything out. I know how stressful it can all be. But you can do it.

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  5. Good luck! Remember to start with baby steps. I'm a total perfectionist too, and it's really hard for me to just let things go.

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  6. I hear ya on this one! I suffer from anxiety issues as well- I call them the "flusters." I don't understand why all of a sudden this is happening, because I am usually a laid back person. Thanks for sharing this with us, it makes me feel human.

    And take small "baby steps" with all of your accomplishments. It is a lot easier to handle and don't be too hard on yourself! Breathe! Your amazing ;-)

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